Top 10 Things for a New Military Spouses to Know

Entering into the military community can be overwhelming because a lot of knew things will be thrown your way. Being a rookie you have to learn the ropes but there are some tricks of the trade that can help you accept your new lifestyle.

10.) Learn your duty station!

Just like moving anywhere else you're going to want to get familiar with your new location as best as you can, and I suggest you start the research ahead of time. As you may or may not know there sometimes isn't a whole lot of time between when you find out where your PCSing to and then actually getting there. It all happens super fast and can feel like a lot but take some time to research the different areas and things to do so you have some activities to look forward to upon your arrival.

9.) Love Your House!

You don't always get a say in what duty station you end up at but you definitely have a say in your house. Many people will just settle for whatever home they get assigned on post and that's great if you love the home but some people just down right don't like them. If you're not thrilled about the homes offered on post look to rent off post or buy! This gives you the liberty to find a home with a little more personality and that may offer different amenities that on post housing can not provide for you. At the end of the day you might be living in a state that feels foreign to you but finding a house that feels like home will definitely help you feel safe and comfortable.

8.) Get to Know Other Wives

Meeting other women can be scary I know! Making friends as adults is way harder than when you were in school but it is really important to reach out to your neighbors. Of course you can make non-military spouse friends but it makes a world of a difference to have someone in your corner who understands the daily struggles of what it takes to be married to a soldier. If you find a friend who is a seasoned military spouse that's a huge bonus because she can share her wisdom with you because I guarantee you she's felt everything you're feeling and she can help you get through it. It is also important to have friends around when your spouse is gone to avoid feeling lonely and isolated.

7.) Learn Army Terms

It sounds silly I know but your husband is going to be spitting out so many acronyms and abbreviations it is going to sound like he got his ABC's messed up. To feel closer to your husband and dive deeper into the military life style try and learn some common phrases you hear him use a lot. This will avoid him having to translate military talk to civilian talk for you. Don't be afraid to ask your husband to break it down for you either because I guarantee you he will be so excited that you are trying to learn about that aspect of his lifestyle.

6.) Keep in Touch With Family

You would never forget about your family but between your new marriage and big move you have forgotten to give mama a call in a few days to let her know you're alright. Starting this new chapter of marriage is going to be so exciting and adding in the aspect of the military life it can be easy to focus on your here and now, which results in you forgetting about life before he kissed the bride. You don't need to give a full detailed report on the daily to dear old dad and they understand you're a busy women but don't forget to check in every once in a while. Keep your siblings updated on your life because when you need to call them about some crazy story you won't have to recap everything else before hand because they will be all caught up. You're family is ecstatic your happy but they do miss having you around.

5.) Find a Routine

Humans are creatures of habits so I'm sure you had a nice little routine worked out for yourself back home but it's time to make a new one! Having a routine will give you a sense of structure and helps you find a grove in your new life. Knowing you have things to do and look forward to will give you a sense of confidence that you are a boss and get things done.

4.) Talk to Your Husband

The simplest piece of advice I can offer you is to confide in your husband. Tell him exactly what your feeling so he can be there for you. Marriage is experiencing highs and lows with each other and being a military family you will definitely experience plenty of both so make sure you're always relaying on each other. The other side of this is to make your husband talk to you! Yes, I know guys don't like to talk about their feelings but it is so important to check in on your husband. Just like you his life has changed A LOT. He has the most stressful job in the world and that paired with the long hours can really make him feel down so just make sure he communicates his struggles with you.

3.) Try Not to Get Upset With Their Schedules

We are all guilty of this. Every single spouse at least once has thrown their hands up with frustration due to their husbands ever changing schedule. It can be heartbreaking when you had an elaborate date night planned but then he gets put on staff duty last minute which ruins your romantic evening. He might have to leave you two days before your birthday to attend a training event several states away. While this is probably the most challenging aspect of military wife life do try to not take you're frustrations out on him because he doesn't want to go either. He wanted to see you all dolled up and sit across you for a nice dinner but instead he's sitting across from a co-worker who's chewing with his mouth open all night. He had a detailed surprise in the works for your birthday but last minute got the word he would not be able to pull of your surprise. You both will become frustrated and get to your wits end with his unpredictable schedule but know you can make the time up when he gets home.

2.) Save, Save, Save

While money is not the most important thing in the world it definitely helps to not have to worry about it. Being a military wife you and you're better half will have so many things to stress about like deployments and moving that being able to not have to stress about money will be a blessing. Keep your financials in check so you always have piece of mind in that department. It may sound obvious to be conscious of your money but military life comes with a lot of unforeseen expenses that will have to come out of your pocket so just be prepared for every bump in the road that you may hit. You'll thank yourself later.

1.) Do Not Lose Yourself

The biggest, most crucial thing to do while being a military spouse is to never lose focus of yourself. Being a wife is a great honor and you are proud to give your husband your all and that's incredible but please don't forget to save a little bit for yourself. Being married you will have your combined married life which will be beautiful but don't forget to be your own people at the same time. I say this from personal experience, get a hobby! I can not stress this enough because when he leaves for training or deployment and you're left with just you its important to have a purpose! It will help you adjust to being alone for long periods of time and it will help fill that lonely void just a tiny bit because there's nothing more heavy on the heart then waiting endlessly for your husband to return with nothing else to make you happy in the mean time.

You'll learn as you go throughout this journey and everyone's experience is different but these are the top 10 things I have learned to be helpful in my own progress of being an Army Wife!