Answering your military spouse question!

Hi readers! Last week I took to instagram and asked you to share what your biggest questions/assumptions about military wives are and today I will answer them! (If you don’t already follow me on Instagram feel free to @izpoole to be involved in future videos)

1.) If your husband gets deployed what does that mean for you and your little one?

If you don’t already know my husband and I are expecting our first baby this May, so preparing for deployment with a baby is something we have had to think about a lot. If my husband was to deploy before my due date he would be sent back stateside within 72 hours of my due date. If I were to go into labor early he would be on the first flight available after a Red Cross message is sent. Now if he is deployed after I deliver I would face the decision of staying at our duty station or going home for the duration of the deployment. All spouses have this option and it’s important to know if your husband has military orders putting him outside of your duty station for longer than 90 days you are allowed to break any lease (thanks to the SSRA). You can pack your belongings up and head home for comfort while your other half is away or you can stay put. Which ever is easier on you and will make you cope better. I personally would stay put, as I am stationed outside of the continental United States so shipping my belongings and pets just wouldn’t make sense.

2.) What is the biggest obstacle you face as a military spouse and how do you overcome it?

My biggest obstacle would have to be not being able to plan. It is embedded in my personality to plan out every detail no matter how small the plan. I had my life mapped out by age 8 if that tells you anything about how much I love to plan. The army however is all about changing plans. They change schedules and dates like its their main job, making all of my plans crumble. Having to deal with that constantly is probably the biggest obstacle I face because it goes completely against my personality but I have gotten better with becoming more go with the flow over the past 3 years (or so I’d like to believe at least).

In the bigger picture my obstacle is that everything is temporary in the military. When you’re moving every three years nothing is permanent. Your house, your job, your friends; it’s all temporary and impossible to establish real roots. I over come that by telling myself I am getting to experience so much more of the country and meet people from all over.

3.) Do you get to chose where you live?

Yes and no. When it comes time to re-enlist you can request a duty station but there is no guarantee you will be granted that station. That duty station has to have an opening during the time you will be moving there for your spouses MOS and rank. If those aren’t available you will be sent elsewhere but the army will try and accommodate the best they can. Personally my husband requested Hawaii and we were able to move here (not requesting it ever again though see my last article).

4.) Do peope in the military get married young/ right out of high school?

There are a lot of young military couple but they don’t just get married because they are young. My personal opinion is that military affiliated people mature faster than others their age. Someone who has enlisted is going to be more ready for marriage compared to a freshman in college. I say this from personal experience I have been a freshman in college and know college students are not financially nor mentally prepared to be married. When enlisted you mature faster by being responsible for your job duties and becoming more independent by being solely reliant on yourself therefore being able to commit to taking care of a family. I’m not saying this is true for every person but in the long run it seems to be the case.

5.) Will it be hard on you and your baby to move around all the time?

Moving is always stressful and always hard military or not. Leaving friends, a job and even a house you made memories in will never get easier but we plan on making the transition as easy as possible for our baby. We have a plan to help acclimate her to her new environments by having her get involved in sports and clubs to make friends and always having an open dialogue with her to know how she’s feeling. By checking in on her we will know how to best help her adjust based on her personality and needs. It will be hard on her but in the long run she will get to travel and meet more people than children who stay in one town their whole life. There are pros and cons to moving around but we will always listen to her and be the best parents we can be.

6.) Do you enjoy being a military spouse?

I enjoy being a military spouse because I love my husband so much. It may sound cheesy but I love him so much that it makes it all worth it. There is nothing I am more proud of then being his support system while he does the most honorable job there is. I appreciate how much this lifestyle has taught me and matured me. I have gained life experiences I never would have if I was not a military spouse. It’s a hard position to be in but it is always worth it to know the sacrifices my family makes helps keep our rights and freedoms preserved.

Check out my YouTube video that goes over this topic and follow me on Instagram to keep up with my daily life as a military wife!

Instagram: @izpoole

Youtube: https://youtu.be/ogGZ6P0nXGA